Generally I hate New Year's Eve and New Year as I think, it's just another day, there's no real difference, but in fact it's a good point to take stock and to make plans for the future. As good a point as any. And in fact I feel quite positive coming into 2016. Even numbered years always sit better with me for some reason. But the main thing is to focus on the now, to keep the mindfulness spirit (which I will be able to do even better thanks to a cool Christmas present) and to continue to be nice to people and other creatures.
Today I began a role at Wiltshire College as a life model - needs must, you see, but in fact it wasn't as bad as you might think. The students are 16 and 17, taking a BTEC in art and design, so they are all keen and they were quite talented (despite the usual lack of confidence in your own work). I was made to feel at ease and despite feeling awkward initially in stripping off my robe, once I was up on my plinth it wasn't unlike being on stage. There was a little bit of the "look at me" thing going on and I must have an exhibitionist side that only comes out occasionally. They were mostly girls, only one boy and he seemed to cope with it fine. The thing is, they are all concentrating on their artwork so they're not even thinking about anything else. I had to stand in several poses for 5 minutes (just long enough for a raised arm to begin to get a bit pins and needly) and then two for 10 minutes, (basically just standing, although I swear I was wobbling a bit) and then got to lay down for 20 minutes, draped over a cushion concoction. This was fine by me. In all of them I tried to focus on the mindfulness breathing, which helped me to concentrate. I also liked listening to the different sounds of the materials on paper - charcoal, chalk, pen. It was soothing.
I wasn't perfectly still, I know, but I suppose wobbling a bit doesn't really affect what they were doing. I had a look at their drawings in between and I think they did a good job - no one made me look too fat (haha) and many of them were really good. It was interesting to see their interpretations of me. You could tell it was me. And I know how hard it is to draw (even stationary things) so I recognise their frustrations. The teacher was encouraging and it was interesting to hear what he was saying. It also felt useful to be helping them with their art. So despite maybe getting a little cold at the end, (although I did have heaters) I quite enjoyed myself. The most boring bit is the bus journey.
I realised I have little body awareness as the teacher shows me a slide of a pose and I really don't know if I'm adopting it or not - I can't convert that pose into what I do with my body. So I'm hoping I might become more aware of how I stand as time progresses. The last one was probably quite a sexily draped look but who knows.
